They don't know me....

i realised something is wrong here...i thought this year would be a better year for me...but everything happened so fast...this is a year full of sadness...more sadness than happiness...;((

i broked up with Lawrence last month....reason??? both of us!! cannot compromise each other...EGO!! it's about trust!! how to keep a relationship if u don't trust each other???!! BULL SHIT!!!

but, he still my bestfriend though...i shared all my sadness & happiness with him throughout the year with him...He's really a good listener...& I LOVE HIM SO MUCHH~!!! i still hope one day we can be together if ada JODOH laa~~~

then my friends....

some of them seems to avoiding me...i don't know why...did i do something?? did i behave wrongly?? did i say something that hurt them?? they once said 'FRIENDS TELLS THE TRUTH EVEN DO IT HURTS'...but they don't...they just leave me like that...clueless...

if they don't want to be my friends it's okay...i don't want either...but don't talk behind me as i am guilty of a crime...i am a normal human being just like u...i can get angry, sad n happy...i eat & drink...n i didn't charge anyone for being my friend...

i want u to know that i am a very sensitive person..i can cry easy...i like to be friends with all of u, no condition, no rules...as long as u ikhlass....u know how i feel when u done this to me?? it feels so terrible & so heart-broken...have u ever see me cry at midnight?? have u ever talk to me if i had a problem?? no!! all u know is being fake with me all the time...the fake smile, the fake greeting, YOUR FRIENDSHIP IS A FAKE TOTALLY!!! i think u don't deserve to be my friend...all u know is being nice in front of me & talk bad about me with your friends...laughing at me & make jokes about me right?? (bguss la lau ko taww dia blg dlm hati...)

plus, you're not good enough...u maybe have pretty face but bad behaviour...if i were a boy i won't choose u...& your not smart either...sorry but it's the truth...TRUTH ALWAYS HURT~~!!!

enough now...i need a rest...i need to calm down...

i'm here because of my family...i have to study & get good grade so my job later would be easier...

i'm not playing around anymore...i have to be serious...nothing matters more than my family...i'm thinking of my sick father & my hardworking mum...even more, my lil sister & brother...how are they doing?? i need to make a call soon...hang on....;((

PLEASE....SOMEBODY SAVE ME....